So anyway, everyone at work is getting the stomach flu. I saw a post on Facebook which stated that the Norovirus is going around, so I am just affirming to myself that I am healthy and I have a strong and capable immune system. I'm visualizing an indestructible invisible force field germ barrier. I have big plans for this weekend! But, you know what they say...when people make plans, God laughs.
I had a better day today. I still feel incredibly sensitive and thin-skinned, and I noticed that I got offended by the littlest things today. I'll give you one stupid example. I was sitting in one row, separated from Mike's row by an aisle. Being tethered to my phone with my headset, I couldn't quite reach Mike. Brenda was between the two of us. Mike had Twizzlers. He gave Brenda some and asked if I wanted one. I said yes and he asked Brenda to share with me, and she REFUSED! She said, "No, I want to eat them all." I thought she was joking, but she never handed me one. What the hell?? She didn't have to give me one of HERS, but shit, how hard would it have been to grab one from Mike and pass it to me? I did let it bother me for a minute, but then I realized it's ridiculous to get all worked up over licorice. If she's got a bug up her butt, so what.
As far as calls went, I had a decent night. No better or worse than the class in general. My smoking buddy quit, which made me a little sad but at least I'll smoke fewer cigarettes without someone to accompany me to the "butt hut". I knew she was planning on quitting, but I didn't know it would be so soon. Our class gradually dwindles down more and more as time goes on.
So, tonight I sat next to Ashley. She is like 8 years younger than I am and ridiculously hot. She's not gay or anything but she was talking to me about some pretty explicitly sexual stuff tonight. It made me feel kind of weird because I was turned on but felt like I shouldn't be or that I should feel guilty about it. She doesn't know I like women and maybe she wouldn't have said the things she did if she knew. Kind of like how a person would feel if they modeled lingerie for their gay male friend only to find out that he isn't actually gay. Then again, the thought crossed my mind that she KNEW, and she was getting a little thrill out of purposely trying to give me dirty thoughts about her.
Oh, dear goddess. LISTEN to me, I sound JUST like a man right now, don't I? Next thing you know, I'll be saying she's asking for it or "Yeahhhh, she wants me". SO like a dude. But I guess I can see things from the male perspective -- women are damn hard to figure out! When someone you're attracted to is being friendly with you, or sexually candid, I guess it's easy to assume (wishful thinking) that they're coming on to you. I know she wasn't, but it does perplex me a little trying to figure out WHY she would have told me the things she did. I mean, she was telling me about her sex toys, and masturbating, and how she had been reading 50 Shades of Gray at her last job and how much it hard turned her on...stuff like that. Oh well, in any case it's a moot point because nothing is ever going to happen with her anyway.
But. There IS this guy at work, his mom owns this little restaurant over by my old house called Sabor Latino. He's a supervisor and I'm sure he has a girlfriend, but....daaaaaaaamn. It's not really even so much how he looks, but his voice...ohmygod. I sound like such an eighth grader right now. I can't help it, though...I'm really a sucker for a smooth, deep voice -- especially with a sexy accent.
Okay, okay, okay. Sorry. I have hormones raging through me right now and it's been a month so please forgive me! I don't want anyone to think I've got a one track mind, I honestly do realize that there are more important things in life. Such as, the CommonUnity.
Juliea and the midwife, Sara, found a beautiful house to use as an office for CommonUnity. Space is available to rent to hold workshops, classes, support groups, massage/reiki appointments, whatever. I'm really excited for the community in general and I want to get involved, but I'm not sure which direction to go. I could have a birth mother support group, or a tarot group, or a book club. I'm going to reflect on it for a while and see what I feel called to do.
Well, hey, it's Friday and I get the kids tomorrow. So, time for bed!
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